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Chapter 1
By the Power of Thurston Thistertinson.
"I woke up in a cold sweat on a ripped, sour smelling mattress.
It was night.
I remembered where I had been but not how I got here.
I struggled for a moment with the blanket and stood up.
I made my way to the front door as my heart began to race.
I heard snoring coming from some room in the dark house.
Quietly I opened the front door and ran outside straight to freedom.
The night was damp and the air heavy as I struggled with every step.
Finally I made it to where I wanted to go...and passed out in the bushes.
Soon the suns alpha waves would ripple over me.
Peak exposure of bi-particles sublimation would transform me.
The rest as they say, is physics."
The story you just read was by John X Phelps
A sci-fi writer.
You can contact him by either gently tapping on the side basement window of his immigrant landlords house or email him at his library address.
Protocols of engagement with Mr. John X Phelps.
1.) Never show up empty handed.
Bring either a bar of soap or an air freshener.
2.) Always maintain eye contract and never turn your back to him.
3.) Resist scratching yourself and sniffing the air in his presence.
4.) Do not use the bathroom.
4a.) If you must, make sure the light is off and bring your own toilet paper.
5.) Do not arrive hungry. Eat beforehand. Nothing greasy.
6.) When you leave, go straight home and shower.
7.) And lastly prayer...Lots of it.
8.) Heck! You should just turn yourself in, to the police as a co-conspirator to whatever nefarious deeds John X Phelps has planned that evening.
9.) Feel sorry for yourself and...
10.) Give up.
El Fonzo Magnifico
